Friday, April 29, 2011
Once again I'm ten steps behind. So many things I want to do, need to do, choose to do and so many things not getting done. I'm sure I could be a little more focused in the I choose to do. I start to feel overwhelmed. Instead of doing something productive to solve the problem, I take a break and play games on my iphone. Add in three trips to school a day and checking to make sure the dog isn't getting into trouble outside every few minutes. Plus, I've become very easily distracted. I can't think straight when the kids around, constantly talking even if it just to themselves. Sometimes I wonder if I just need to table the big dreams of being an artist for the time being. I'm so frustrated with myself for not doing anything well, for letting all the plates crash to the ground. I miss the early days of creating when I was happy with myself for the littlest things. If I found a few minutes every few days I savored it, not letting a to do list weigh me down. I want that feeling back. I want to feel joy and my art to express it!